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Raise your hand if you’re tired. Raise your hand if you’re anxious. Raise your hand if you’re ready for a return to normalcy. Did anyone have their hand down? I, for one, am tired and certainly ready for some normalcy. Nonetheless, as I and other parents look ahead to another semester of home-learning for our children, normalcy still seems a way off.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)
Christ’s words graciously sound in refrain through my mind. His words are more than an invitation; they are a holy calling. A little less than a year ago, we reflected upon the theological practice of Sabbath through our All Saints Adult Christian Education series. We were reminded of God’s commandment to the Israelites to rest from their labors every 7th day, and to keep this sabbath day— this day of rest— holy. Their resting would follow God’s own practice of resting on the 7th day of creation.
But God’s commandment to the Israelites was not only about the sabbath day, but about a regular pattern and practice of holy rest. In addition to the 7th day sabbath rest God called for the Israelites to observe a Sabbatical Year and a Jubilee Year. Every 7th year was to be the Sabbatical Year, during which the fields were to be left fallow and debts released. This is part of the law of the covenant made clear in Leviticus (25:1-7). And Leviticus teaches us that a series of forty-nine years (7 times 7) was to be counted; and every fiftieth year declared a special year—a Jubilee Year— during which there was to be no agricultural work; all landed property was to revert to its original owner; and slaves were to be set free (Leviticus 25:8-54).
Through Sabbath, Sabbatical Year and Jubilee Year, God creates and then invites God’s people into a regular rhythm of Holy Rest. And lest we, as Christians, are tempted to dismiss this invitation because we are people of the new covenant, we need to remember the Gospels telling of Jesus’s regular pattern of holy rest, when he would remove himself from the crowd and go to the mountains to pray.
Even in “normal times,” our daily lives contain stresses big and small. And we live in a culture that feeds us the unrelenting myth of the Urgency of NOW! Certainly, in a time as trying as this (what I am calling Coronatide— like Eastertide or Christmastide… but a lot less fun!) we are all in need of the wisdom and grace offered to us in the commandment to Holy Rest.
The commandment to Holy Rest— Sabbath, Sabbatical, Jubilee— graciously invites us to create times and patters of rest, and to exercise patience and trust in God, replacing ourselves with God as the center of our lives. When we stop and rest, we remember that we are not the Creator of the Universe, the Ruler of Time, the Savior of ourselves, but we are invited into a deeper understanding of our dependence upon God’s provision and our interdependence on one another.
I wonder, how are you who are weary and heavy-laden observing God’s commandment to Sabbath rest? What that you’re doing is restorative to your tired soul? What are you doing that you need to do less of to make time for rest and restoration? Remember, that these times of rest are holy. And if you can’t give yourself permission to rest, remember that God commands you to do so! That should absolve you of any lingering guilt.
So, grab a book, or close your eyes and nap on the couch, or walk gently in the mountains or on the shore. Pray. Wrestle with your kid, or have a one-person dance party, or fill the house with the smell of home-baked love. Pray. But whatever you do, make time to rest your burdens and your weary self in the loving arms of Christ.
–Rev. Aimée Eyer-Delevett
Learn Moreby Barbra Mousouris
Psalm 116:1, 10-17
1 I love the Lord, because he has heard the voice of my supplication,
…..
because he has inclined his ear to me whenever I called upon him.
10 How shall I repay the Lord
…..
for all the good things he has done for me?
11 I will lift up the cup of salvation
…..
and call upon the Name of the Lord.
12 I will fulfill my vows to the Lord
…..
in the presence of all his people.
13 Precious in the sight of the Lord
…..
is the death of his servants.
14 O Lord, I am your servant;
…..
I am your servant and the child of your handmaid;
you have freed me from my bonds.
15 I will offer you the sacrifice of thanksgiving
…..
and call upon the Name of the Lord.
16 I will fulfill my vows to the Lord
…..
in the presence of all his people,
17 In the courts of the Lord’S house,
…..
in the midst of you, O Jerusalem.
Hallelujah!
Do you feel exhausted lately? Or just off? Sometimes it is hard to fulfill those vows? We live in a very strange and scary time. I would like to take a minute to reflect on triggers and trauma.
In my work as a clinical hypnotherapist, I work with clients on deep seated, often buried traumatic memories and triggers, and how our mental health is interrelated within our bodies.
But first a story: A man lived in this big old drafty farm house. Because it had several fire places, it was required to have extremely top of the line smoke detectors. The problem was, they went off ALL THE TIME. Anytime of day, seemingly for no rhyme or reason. Maybe it was smoke, maybe it was a draft, maybe it was pizza in the oven…but it made it impossible to feel at peace in his own home, because just when he would start to relax those things would start blaring like an ambulance was coming through the kitchen.
There is nothing worse than having to be jumpy all the time because of a faulty alarm system. (Some of you know what I mean with your car or your home security system.) And friends, this is how trauma works in our bodies. It festers and it multiplies. Science is showing us that trauma lives inside your nervous system. It’s an involuntary reaction that you have when you are triggered–even by something seemingly innocent, ANYTHING that unconsciously reminds you of a situation in which you felt extremity threatened, at any time in your past. This experience is stored in your lower brain, and associated with danger, to act as an alarm system for the future to keep you safe. And then anything that even remotely gets associated with that threat sets off a traumatic fight or flight reaction in us.
And here is the thing: its is biological, not psychological. So you cannot think your way out of it. You might KNOW that you are no longer in danger, no longer that bullied child, no longer that solider in a war zone, no longer that person in an abusive relationship or an employee in a toxic work environment.
But on a cellular level, your body doesn’t know. It has simply stored data from your entire life. It’s a mechanism responding to stimulus, like that smoke detector or that overly sensitive car alarm. And right now we are all living in an emotionally insecure time, out of our control, with the news triggering again and again our powerless concerns.
SO: the secret, first of all, is to realize that YOU ARE NOT LOSING YOUR MIND. Everyone is triggered all the time right now. In fact, I honestly believe that almost everyone I know is very subtly being reminded of their all time worst moments in life right now without realizing it. Old vulnerabilities coming up all the time.
One help is we might want to start limiting the consumption of news and social media. Don’t get rid of it, especially now when it is giving connection to people who need it, and getting out important messages like Black Lives Matter. But DO limit your intake to what you can’t handle, balanced with quiet, as well as in prayer and devotional reading. Journaling or talking with a trusted friend can help ground us. We can LEARN TO CALM DOWN OUR BODY. When you feel triggered, remember this is involuntary and biological…your heart speeds up, your breathing shallows, your muscles tense, you are ready to spring. Slow down before you react. BREATHE deeply, remember where you are and that you are safe. Move your body, walk in nature, dance, run, sing, create, do some yoga, get that body moving to shake out the trauma. Have you ever seen a dog after a good scare? They shake their bodies to get the trauma out!
This uncertain time can also be a wake-up call of empathy, that some people really DO live in danger, all the time. And those people have to deal with the traumatic triggers of things like intergenerational racism and persecution, increased risk of public harassment, bullying or police brutality, while also dealing with triggers that go off at any time.
Most importantly, we have to give each other a lot more love and permission here to not be at our best. And give ourselves some loving down time. You are human, which makes you wounded and complicated. Like every other human, and Jesus before us, who loves us always. As he said in Psalm 116, Call upon His name. AMEN.
And so I wonder…is there a time when you realized you were reacting from past stress, and was there a way you were able to move from stress into peace? I welcome your thoughts.
Learn MoreWell… it looks like most of us will be social distancing for a while longer. No quick solutions, lots of confusion and an ever larger selection of face masks to chose from. In the midst of this some of us find ourselves discovering new and unexpectedly pleasant surprises.
When many of us first began to use Zoom it felt like an awkward substitute for the real thing. However over time it is revealing new dimensions. Do you remember how tiresome it was to drive to All Saints for services and meetings when traffic was bad on the 101? Now, attending is much easier (once you master getting on line).
When we started doing Compline on line people kept flickering on and off as electronic complications arose. There were moments of silence since many folks did not know each other. Now it is often a fast moving exchange with people checking in with each other. People who would only greet each other at coffee hour now have gotten to know each other much better. People from far away routinely join us. (New Zealand, South America, and the East Coast so far).
I have even learned that Compline is an English word derived from an ancient Latin word meaning completion, to finish, the day is over and we are done. St. Benedict first used this word around 530 AD to send his monks to sleep after these night time prayers. So we are doing a very old custom in a very new way.
Our Parish is rich in Zoom offerings. Please try out one or more of these meetings and explore this new way of being part of our community. I think you will be glad you did!
Peace,
Fr. Paul
18 At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” 2 He called a child, whom he put among them, 3 and said, “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Whoever becomes humble like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5 Whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.
6 “If any of you put a stumbling block before one of these little ones who believe in me, it would be better for you if a great millstone were fastened around your neck and you were drowned in the depth of the sea. 7 Woe to the world because of stumbling blocks! Occasions for stumbling are bound to come, but woe to the one by whom the stumbling block comes!
8 “If your hand or your foot causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away; it is better for you to enter life maimed or lame than to have two hands or two feet and to be thrown into the eternal fire. 9 And if your eye causes you to stumble, tear it out and throw it away; it is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and to be thrown into the hell of fire.
By Robert Brown
Well, we certainly have some unsavory images and extreme advice from our Lord in this gospel passage. It would seem reasonable to be troubled by these recommendations of self-mutilation and mortal punishment.
And, as so often is the case, we need to look beyond our first reactions, in an attempt to get to the center of what Jesus wants us to hear.
The disciples are asking who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Could this indicate that they are interested in competition, pride, prestige and power, or do they just want to know how they fit into the kingdom.
The kingdom of heaven is a core part of our faith tradition, highlighted by Jesus many times in scripture, and a core theological underpinning of the prayers and liturgical systems of our Book of Common Prayer.
In today’s Gospel passage, the quality of the humility of a child is raised to utmost importance in our relationship with the kingdom.
Humility is defined as a state of low self-importance. This is different than a state of low self-love, or low self-care. Humility implies an awareness of the importance of others, maybe even suggests an awareness of every person’s God-given intrinsic, equal and divine worth.
Jesus provides a dire warning to those who would intentionally put a stumbling block in someone else’s path. Stumbling blocks are bound to happen occasionally, but woe to those who would purposely cause another to stumble. The eternal fire and the hell of fire are places to avoid at all costs. Jesus is asking his disciples to look at the parts of themselves which lack humility and work against the benefit of others. Certainly one stumbles when intentionally causing another to stumble.
So I wonder, how have innocent stumbles, and humility played a part in your faith journey?
Learn More
Reflection for 4th of July Weekend
By Rev. Vicki
As we approach the holiday weekend, I cannot help but wonder what the 4th of July might mean to us as Christians in the middle of a pandemic. Do we observe the day but not celebrate in the company of hundreds or thousands so that all might be safe? Yes, we may need to honor country with family only and keep barbeques and festivities on the home front. We may need to think of time outside the home as a time of social distancing and mask wearing for there is a reason that there are no fireworks, concerts, 4th of July sales, or massive parades. We are still at the mercy of an unseen enemy. This quieter holiday might give us time to reflect on what it means for us to be a nation with freedoms our forefathers dreamed of for all to have. I would like to share with you some food for thought:
The Preamble to the Declaration of Independence – We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of happiness.
From the Constitution of the United States – We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.
Amendment 1 (to the Constitution) – Religion and Expression – Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
The Star-Spangled Banner (first verse only) –
O say, can you see, by the dawn’s early light,
What so proudly we hail’d at the twilight’s last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars, thro’ the perilous fight,
O’er the ramparts we watch’d, were so gallantly streaming?
And the rockets’ red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof thro’ the night that our flag was still there.
O say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave?
And as Christians, how do we overlay the above with the following from Matthew 22:35- 40? …and one of them, a lawyer, asked him a question to test him. “Teacher, which commandment in the law is the greatest?” He said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the greatest and first commandment. And a second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.”
May God bless your weekend and your thoughts.
Learn MoreDear Steadfast All Saints Families,
I know that many of you are having conversations about race, racism, systemic/institutional racism, and white privilege. While there are currently many resources being shared in the media and on social media to help you talk with your children and grandchildren, I want to highlight some of them as well as share my own experiences, positive and negative, about discussing racial issues with my children.
Before diving into a conversation with your child or grandchild, take some time to consider how your own race has influenced your life. If you are white, learn more about white privilege and fragility. A good place to start is the article, What Is White Privilage, Really? Consider the social constructs that supported and benefited you, your parents, your grandparents, and your great-grandparents compared to members of other races. In your life, what does white privilege look like in Santa Barbara?
Often when white people begin to explore racial issues for the first time, we have a wide range of emotions. This is what Robin DiAngelo calls the fragility of white privilege. I recommend learning about it so that when you speak openly and honestly about racism with your children or grandchildren, you will be less defensive, less reactive, more compassionate, and more committed to systemic change. I recommend reading these short articles:
• How ‘white fragility’ supports racism and how whites can stop it
• ‘Interrupt The Systems’: Robin DiAngelo On ‘White Fragility’ And Anti-Racism.
If you are Black or brown or your children or grandchildren are, odds are that you have been having conversations about race for years in your home. Your family doesn’t have the luxury of ignorance or thinking “that wouldn’t happen to me or to my kid,” so you can’t unsee, dismiss, or forget prejudicial slights, racial biases, or systemic racism. I cannot imagine how stressful this must be for you, your children, and your grandchildren day to day. Please know at All Saints, we, the staff, we see you, we hear you, we love you, and we stand with you as we work to dismantle systemic racism.
Here are some resources for you that might be helpful for your conversations with your children or grandchildren about racism:
• CNN & Sesame Street Town Hall on Racism
• Talking with Our Children about Race
• A Short Family Guide to Support Racial Justice Now
• Social Justice Books – Get age appropriate book lists for you and your children on a variety of social justice issues and links to purchase them from small bookstores.
When starting a conversation about race and racism with your children and grandchildren, you might first ask if they have any questions for you. You may be surprised about how much they are aware of. Children pick up more than we know. Often, they infer and make incorrect assumptions, which as their parents and grandparents, we need to correct.
For example, Deron and I have been talking about racial injustice in our home since our boys were tiny. We read them books about Sylvia Mendez and Ruby Bridges. We told them stories about our families’ hometowns, stories of MLK, Medgar Evers, James Meredith, and the “I Am A Man” Memphis garbage workers strike. When we talked with the boys about Black Lives Matter, they were confused. They thought that racism had ended long ago (major white privilege here!). That was when I realized that 1) our children’s books tend to put happy spins on the end of books: Sylvia won her court case; Mexican children now go to school with white children. Ruby integrated a white school; now all schools are integrated. And 2) we hadn’t been talking about race in present tense, talking about racism as it is today. So we did.
I decided to talk to each child separately first and then have a family conversation. My boys are seven and eight, and they process the world differently. By giving them each one on one time with me, they had space to ask questions, change the subject, have emotions, and return to the issue without their brother present. Each conversation followed a similar vein. First, I told about the beliefs of white supremacists and how that has not changed since the Civil Rights Movement, Ruby Bridges, and Martin Luther King. One child, who is a huge Harry Potter fan, asked if white people treated Black people like some wizards treat wizards with non-magical parents, “Like calling them mudbloods?” In the Wizarding World of J.K. Rowling, mudbloods is a very derogatory word. I said, yes. And we went from there exploring the difference between racism and prejudice and what systemic and institutional racism is in Harry Potter before I introduced the 400 years of institutional racism in the United States.
I also gave the boys the book Civil Rights Then and Now: A Timeline for the Fight for Equality in America to help them understand that the struggle for Civil Rights for Black Americans has not ended.
Armed with my experience from conversation with Child 1, I began with my conversation with Child 2 in the Harry Potter world. This worked out very well because he and I chatted for a long time about the similarities. Child 2 has a shorter attention span, so I was in and out.
My next conversations with my children were about what they can do, which is quite a lot for a seven and eight-year-old. But when I considered the conversations that my friends who parent Black and brown seven-year-olds are having with them, I didn’t hesitate. For too long, white parents have used our white privilege to shield our white children from the realities facing their Black and brown classmates by saying: “they’re too young,” “I don’t want them to know about the horrors in the world just yet,” or worse “it doesn’t affect my child.”
I decided to present three scenarios to my boys and let them consider how they would respond. First, I started our conversation by asking them what could do if they saw a kid at school being bullied. Each said he could tell the bully to stop, go ask the kid if they were okay, say that we don’t treat people that way, and tell a teacher. I gave them high fives.
I asked them to imagine that he saw someone calling someone names or leaving someone out of a game on the playground because of the color of their skin. What would he do? They said they would tell the bully to stop it and ask the kid if he wants to play with them.
Finally, what if they thought their coach was being tougher on the only brown kid on their baseball team? At this question, they looked at me and asked, “Why would he do that?” I told them to just imagine, please. They said they would ask their friend how he was feeling and give him a hug.
Next I taught him about being an ally. Being an ally is about supporting a Black or brown person, not speaking for them and taking their power away. It is about working with your Black and brown friends to use your whiteness to draw attention to an injustice. When you do that, you become a collaborator, and as a collaborator, you are really working to create a better world through social change. My boys minimally understand about collaboratorship and allyship, but they do know about bullies. They do not like bullies. Bullies are dragons they want to slay. By equating racism with bullying, I hope my little boys will be on the lookout for opportunities to become allies.
As a family we watched CNN and Sesame Street’s Town Hall on Race. The boys squirmed often through it and didn’t want to watch it. They are too old for Sesame Street and too young for much of the conversations. Towards the end, their ears perked up when the conversation turned to discrimination towards the Asian community. Their cousin is Asian American. Suddenly being an ally to the Black and brown community had a new meaning. Someone might be racist to their cousin. And just like that, they had skin in the game.
To understand white privilege, we read the book Race Cars: A Children’s Book on White Privilege. The book also helped us begin conversations around systemic racism and discuss issues of power, control, and institutional racism. My kids found none of this fair, especially when we talked about how all of these “rules” are different for their cousin because she is brown. One note about Race Cars, the book presents systemic racism as if the Black Car (and also the White Car) have no power to change the power structures, which create unfair rules for the Black Car to follow. When discussing this with your children or grandchildren, I urge you to bring attention to how this is different from real life where Black, white, and brown people can, have, are, and will work together to eliminate institutional racism.
Discussing racism with our children and grandchildren is an ongoing discussion. It is not a one and done. I urge you to continue examining your white privilege, to expand your friendship circle because most white people have no Black or brown friends, and to keep learning about institutional racism in the United States.
If you have preschoolers, here are several wonderful books to add to their anti-racist library collection:
If you have upper elementary and middle schoolers, I highly recommend This Book is Anti-Racist.
If you have teens in your home, I recommend that together you read and watch both Just Mercy and The Hate U Give. Just Mercy is available free this month for viewing on many platforms.
Rev. Aimee is hosting a Zoom movie discussion on Just Mercy on Monday, July 29th at 7 p.m.
I will host a youth movie night on Zoom in July. We will watch and discuss The Hate U Give. Keep an eye out for dates and times.
I also highly recommend the books: Stamped from the Beginning: A Definitive History of Racists Ideas in America for parents and Stamped: Racism, Anti-Racism, and You: A Remix of the National Book Award Winning Stamped From the Beginning for youth.
If you are looking for more books on race, white privilege, racism, and anti-racism, check out the NY Times and Amazons bestsellers lists.
Peace,
Allison
Learn More
Bell Tower Reflection 6/19/20
Benjamin Hanson
The virus has been hard on everyone, but due to my chosen path I am particularly attuned to the challenges faced by performing arts organizations at this time. Orchestras and other performing arts groups around the country have canceled their seasons and are preparing to either move online or radically rethink their approach to performances. These organizations are struggling with unforeseeable problems while working to remain solvent, including Santa Barbara’s own Camerata Pacifica.
The picture for choirs is particularly bleak. Ever since the now-famous superspreader event during a choir practice in Washington state that led to 86.7% of the singers in attendance becoming infected, choral musicians have been grappling with how and when to resume rehearsals and performances. Singing seems to be a uniquely efficient method of spreading the virus, and given the musical and logistical challenges associated with distancing in a choir, most scientists and choral professionals maintain that it would be irresponsible for choirs to reconvene in person for the foreseeable future.
The current reality is that you or I are not likely to hear live music in the way that we are accustomed to for many, many more months, including live concerts and live music in worship.
I write this not to depress you, but to encourage a new perspective. Just as our Sunday worship has moved from the shared space of the Parish Hall and back into each of our homes, so too must the music-making. There is no better time to dust off a guitar, piano, or other instrument to try to learn something new, and there’s no better time to sing a comforting hymn to yourself to ask for grace and reassurance. You could even try writing a song or poem. Remember, many of the Psalms were written by early Christians to sing in private gatherings in their own homes!
Furthermore, I want to invite you to sing along on Sunday. The virtual services that are posted every Sunday include two hymns with the music printed in the bulletin, just like when we were worshiping in the Parish Hall. I encourage you to join in with the hymns, just like how you would speak the prayers along with the video. The lyrics are even shown on-screen!
Many of the hymns will be familiar, and others might take a few verses before you catch on. Either way, please sing with me! Hymns, unlike music written for separate performers and audiences, are prayers whose words take on new life when you yourself sing them. They are designed for participation, without which they fall flat.
Instead of mourning the absence of live music, we can celebrate that we have all become members of the wider choir that sings songs of praise and prayer in the homes of the faithful all around the world. “So we do not lose heart. Even though our outer nature is wasting away, our inner nature is being renewed day by day. For this slight momentary affliction is preparing us for an eternal weight of glory beyond all measure” (2 Cor 4:16-17).
I ask you to try to find some music in yourself on Sunday, and maybe even throughout the week. J.S. Bach said that “the aim and final end of all music should be none other than the glory of God and the refreshment of the soul.” If singing isn’t your thing, take some time to play an instrument, or hum a tune. Personally, I’m partial to whistling. Any act of beauty gives glory to God.
I’ll close with the oft-cited Psalm 150, which offers a spirited call to all Christians for full-throated praise of God through music. May it bring you inspiration and assurance this week and for the rest of your days:
Praise the Lord!
Praise God in his sanctuary;
praise him in his mighty firmament!
Praise him for his mighty deeds;
praise him according to his surpassing greatness!
Praise him with trumpet sound;
praise him with lute and harp!
Praise him with tambourine and dance;
praise him with strings and pipe!
Praise him with clanging cymbals;
praise him with loud clashing cymbals!
Let everything that breathes praise the Lord!
Praise the Lord!
From the strange routine of staying home, to the uncertainty of emerging with masks into public life, to the drama of the nationwide protests, I feel as if we have all been put through the wringer.
The killing of George Floyd has put all of us into new places and yet asking old questions to which I wish we had better answers. Our country has been through a lot, with more likely to come. (Does anyone expect a quiet run-up to our November elections?) Even St. John’s Episcopal Church on Lafayette Square in Washington D. C. has become a scene of wild dispute.
So what is a good Christian to do? Well perhaps we should begin by not being too surprised by everything going on. History would tell us that things have never been peaceful––we only thought they were. However, as Christians we are called to always live in hope and mercy. And we are always to persevere in prayer, and for that prayer to become more serious and searching! As part of this effort we are invited to ask God troubling questions.
Once, I had a wonderful parishioner who at the age of 99 had outlived all her friends and family. She kept asking God, “What’s the big idea leaving me here so alone?” When she left us at the age of 101 I am sure God had some answering to do. And I am sure he did.
As our life gets more disturbing, let our prayers become more serious. This is the way the Church has always persevered and outlived each time of troubles.
–Fr. Paul
Learn MoreIn the months since COVID-19 changed the patterns of our lives, All Saints’ clergy, vestry, and staff have been carefully monitoring safety guidelines established by the state, county, and diocese to ensure that the decisions we make about our public life protect the lives and safety of our church members and our wider communities. We have all had to make radical changes to the way we conduct business, school, worship, even grocery shopping! I am proud of the care that the people of All Saints and that residents of Santa Barbara County have taken on behalf of the common good. I also know that we are all growing weary and are ready for things to get “back to normal.”
In recent weeks, the state, county and diocese have created new guidelines allowing for churches to resume in-person ministries at their churches. State and county guidelines restrict the size of gatherings to 25% of the full capacity of our worship space. This week, the Episcopal Diocese of Los Angeles (EDLA) published guidelines detailing additional safety measures that need to be considered as we discern our readiness for resuming in-person worship and ministry. I encourage you to read the guidelines to understand more fully how our public worship will change once we are able to gather in person again. I also want to assure you that the EDLA’s efforts are consistent with efforts being made throughout the Episcopal Church and other denominational bodies throughout the country. Also helpful are the additional resources provided in the EDLA’s “Discerning our Readiness to Resume Physical Presence in Church.”
I and the vestry, having considered these guidelines, have determined that we are not able to resume in-person worship at this time. The restricted capacity of our Parish Hall would allow for an occupancy of only 23.5 people. In order to accommodate our congregation, we would need to hold 10 services a week, which is simply not sustainable for lay leaders, staff and clergy. We plan to continue Virtual Worship until social distancing guidelines are relaxed or until our sanctuary renovation is complete and ready for our return. Our highest goal is to honor God by taking great care of each precious life in this community, and beyond. As vestry member Marni McGee wrote, “To me, [delaying in-person worship] is the only way to express our love for one another. We show our love by protecting each other.”
In the meantime, All Saints will continue our robust and meaningful virtual ministries. We will continue to worship together 6 days of the week via Zoom and our Virtual Sunday Service. We will continue to minister to one another through Virtual Christian Formation, Outreach to our community, and ongoing Pastoral Care. We will also create a Task Force for Resuming Physical Presence in Church, consisting of clergy, lay leaders, and staff members. The Task Force will work together to determine how All Saints can adapt our practices to public health and diocesan guidelines to ensure the well-being of all who gather.
If you have any questions or feedback, we would be happy to hear them. You can communicate them to office@allsaintsbythesea.org, and we will make sure your question or concern is considered and responded to by church leadership.
Thank you all for your continued participation in All Saints’ ministries of Worship, Formation, Outreach and Pastoral Care, even in our physical distance. Our experience during these months has certainly confirmed that the church is not a building, but is the people worshiping God, forming the faithful, and ministering to one another and the world in the name of Christ’s redeeming love.
My prayers continue for each of you. May you know God’s abiding presence and peace in your life.
Rev. Aimée
Learn MoreDear Resilient All Saints Families,
Have you ever noticed that the straw that broke the camel’s back is small? It is just as small as all of the other straws before it. It wasn’t any different, larger, more annoying, or louder. It just was. That’s what happened to me today. The last straw fell, and I found myself freaking out over something that I would have usually ignored and probably would have laughed at yesterday. And before I knew it I was in the bathroom hiding from my family. Why? Because I couldn’t take one more straw!
What happened? Nothing really. What’s going on in my house is probably no different that what is going on in your house. My children are missing their friends. They need more social interactions. We are slightly bribing them to do their school work with the reward of more interesting “school” work on the computer when they finish their required work. Tantrums ensue when one does not understand his work. Spouses become irritable when they don’t get enough exercise or alone time, for eight weeks.
And then there are the pet peeves. My husband’s is leaving drawers and cabinets open (so why did he marry, and stay married for 20+ years, to a woman who constantly forgets to close cabinets). Mine is leaving the front and back doors open and letting flies in. I gave birth to two children who seem incapable of closing a door without a reminder. During a family zoom this weekend, my whole family laughed as I shouted at the boys to close both the front and back doors. The boys had disappeared without a trace! And please don’t get us started on the background loop Pokemon commentary throughout our day.
After nine weeks, we are beginning to get on each other’s nerves.
But I hit the wall today over an innocuous action by my youngest child. He has been catching flies to feed their tadpole when they turn into frogs. This weekend they caught tadpoles and minnows in the creek and brought them home along with a 4 inch slug. Last weekend they found little salamanders. The weekend before, they petted a kingsnake on a hike. I do love my little herpetologists – but I do not like flies.
Kellar came up to me quite distressed holding his hand out asking, “Mama, do you think he’s dead or just stunned?”
I looked down at that fly and grossly overreacted, “Dead. Throw him in the trash.”
“I caught him on the window, but I just think I stunned him because he’s not moving.”
“Dead. And wash your hands. Flies are nasty! Nasty! Nasty!”
The child then proceeded to poll every member of our family because he couldn’t trust his irrational mother who was still yelling at him to wash his hands.
And this is where our story ends today. With us, all of us, nine weeks of being apart from each other wondering how do I care for myself and my children? What do I need to do for myself so that I can remain calm and kind in order to be available when my child melts down or my significant other is stressed out? How do I stay present in the moment when I am worried about how long life will be like this?
Well, I’m sorry to say that I don’t have all of the answers. I’m figuring this out along with y’all. But I think there are three tricks to staying sane while at home with our family members:
1. Be Social (appropriately).
During social distancing, we have lost our small, every day, social interactions which are so vital for our mental and spiritual wellbeing. So we must make an effort now to have them. We need to pick up the phone and call our friends. We can pick flowers and leave them on our neighbors’ porches. We can write letters to the children and elderly in our sphere. We can mail our children’s art work to their godparents and grandparents. Mostly chat with someone again; it will do you some good!
2. Find Solitude.
We also lost our alone time and space. Everyone is always up in each other’s business unless they are on a zoom call. I can’t be the only one who says I’m going to the potty and then hides in bathroom until someone notices I’ve been gone for 30 minutes. Many of us don’t have down time from our children or our work. The separation is gone, and so is a chance for solitude. Solitude is the alone time that refreshes us. We need to carve out time for solitude during our day. This can be journaling, taking a walk, sitting quietly under a tree, or enjoying our morning coffee and tea. The challenge is negotiating that solitude time with our family. Try it this week, and see how you feel.
3. Be Present.
This one is difficult for me. As the weeks progress, my to do list grows along with my anxieties around COVID-19. However, to be fully present and in the moment, I must set aside whatever distractions are niggling me and fully engage in the present moment. I have this wonderful opportunity to spend several months with my children and husband, but to be present, I need to stop worrying and planning. What do you need to do in order to be present in each moment?
I believe that if we practice these three things right now, they will also draw us closer to God. When we connect to others, we have the opportunity to seek and serve Christ in them. When we have solitude, we may hear the still, small voice of God. And when we are fully present, we are also aware of God’s joyous creation and are actively engaging in it and with it. Much better than hiding in the bathroom reading the news or scrolling through Facebook. May we all have a better week than the day I had.
Peace,
Allison Grisham
Director of Children, Youth, and Family Ministries
Rev. Vicki Kirk Mouradian
Bell Tower Reflection for 5/22/20
from Rev. Vicki
In this time of pandemic upheaval, I came across these prayerful words of
St. Eata (died 686), an early English abbot and bishop. The English historian Bede described him as a gentle and greatly revered man. As an administrator Eata applied his skills at the time of plague, civil disorders, and major ecclesiastical change. His thoughts ring true for us today:
If we are hardworking, but self-satisfied,
only a poor lean harvest will reward us.
Come harvest time, each one’s work
will yield what it may yield.
Lord, I am here,
pausing in the middle of the work
that is yet to do.
I look at my work, my life,
and try to shake off the weariness.
Teach me again, dear Lord,
to number my days.
Call out in me a willingness
to love and serve.
I do not know, and I
am not required to know
when I am going to die.
In fact, I have nothing to do with it.
Many a life has been injured
by the constant expectation of death.
It is life we have to do with,
not death.
The best preparation for the night
is to work diligently while the day lasts.
When days seem dark,
and I feel lonely and discouraged,
then give me glimpses of Your glory
to sustain me.
Now think of me, and I shall know
I am because You are.
Only You make the universe worth being
or any life worth living.
All my days I will grow safe,
deep in Your shadow;
strong in hope, we know Your
ways are true.
You, O Christ, are our perfect brother
Perfect in love, in courage,
in tenderness.
Call out in me
that willingness to love and serve.
Come harvest-time, each one’s work
will yield what it may yield.
But to be turned with the soil,
disrupted, replanted,
to bed down, and then
grow with God’s seasons,
seems to require the softening
of the ground with many tears.
I have learned to abandon my own plans
without complaint, though often
my ready smile lay close about
the wells of weeping.
We stretch out our hand and throw,
and many, many seeds we sow.
In truth, we do not know
where they will go,
which will take root
or when the unlikeliest ground
will return
glimpses of gold.
Sowing at times in tears,
persisting through the years,
sometimes pulled away
to go and harvest another field…
Come harvest-time. Each one’s work
will yield what it may yield.
Let us embody Your ready kindness
in our day,
for things will not be
as they were before.
